These days, I find myself needing to be more and more inspired to get out of bed in the morning. Either I'm beginning to feel my age (a ripe old 24), or I'm saving up my energy for my own spontaneous combustion. I remember back in Kindergarten there was the infamous "quiet time". You were forced to either open up an old and possibly soiled cot to nap on, or catch some zzzs on vinyl mat which had dried drool on it from the previous occupant. I opted to nap at my desk with my head down instead of taking my chances with the saliva or urine. Still, nap time was an excellent idea, and I think that it should be reinstated for the collegiate community. I know there's nothing that I would rather be doing around 1 in the afternoon than sleeping.
But I digress. I know it is a normal phenomenon, but when I actually want to be doing something, I do it well. When I don't, I half ass it and somehow manage to stumble through. The other day for example, I didn't get into work until 12:00 noon. Now, it's nice that I have one of those jobs where as long as you get the work done, they don't care how late you are there. But not every place it like that. That's not the proverbial "real world" which I have heard so much about since I began high school 10 or so years ago. I'll have to visit the "real world" sometime...sounds interesting. I've decided that I need to inspire myself to do more things like I am expected to do now, and less like I was expected to do them in Kindergarten. I therefore find myself on a search for inspiration.
My boss sent this to me in an email...is she trying to tell me something?
How do you inspire the uninspired? If I knew the answer to that one, I would be completely moved in, house cleaned, work done, papers written, and still find time to catch eight hours of sleep a night. Currently, I have only managed the latest in that laundry list of things...ah crap, I forgot about the laundry! Inspiration can come in the strangest places. Whether it be on the bumper sticker on the car in front of you (ESP, PMS, the bitch that knows it all), or from a book or television show, simply from just sitting and staring out the window. Maybe I need to buy one of those posters or something that is supposed to stir the creative juices so to speak. I'm not sure about those though. I don't need to look at a rock climber holding on for dear life while scaling some peak to remind me to get my lazy ass out of bed and go to work. Life just isn't that exciting for most people. Maybe it's something that you simply can't force. Inspiration may just simply be something that the unsuspecting passer-by finds, and then gets that little jolt they need to go out and make some progress. Either way, hopefully either I will find mine, or it will find me.
Moving can be a real bitch. Those of you that have done it, you must certainly feel my pain. Basically, you manage to box up all your stuff, somehow load it into a truck, ship it to wherever it needs to go, and then unpack and put it all away. Now that I have finished demeaning you with the obvious, I should add that it really is hard work. I now know how the Hermit Crab feels when it is looking for a new home. According to Wikipeida: "A hermit crab with a shell which is too tight cannot grow as fast as hermit crabs with well-fitting shells, and is more likely to be eaten." Jeeze, if we were crustaceans Bill Gates would cannibalize us all.
One of the things that makes moving the most frustrating is the fact that I am a very impatient person. I want everything to get done right away, right now. Unfortunately, that is often not the case. We made good time coming back, but now here it is, five weeks later, and there are still boxes everywhere. I seriously wonder if people were to break in and see the place as it was if they would even deem it worth their time, or simply go rob the neighbors. Only recently have I finally found the time to sit down and have a good old fashioned un-pack. Things generally get put back into order, but recently I have found that the place I am in now has much more wall space than my old place. Translation: I either need pictures or a couple big-ass flat screen televisions to cover up all the empty space. Being on a budget...pictures it is.
When you wake up, you will either freak out or have a seizure with this by your bed...
Shopping for pictures though is actually much harder than you would think. I've been up and down pretty much to every place in town and found nada, ziltch, nill, zero. Every time I find something that I think might work, I see the $400 price tag attached to it. I seriously don't feel like paying that much money for a framed picture. Like I said earlier, I'd rather have a television. I think the problem boils down to the fact that I don't have even the slightest clue as to how to decorate a house. That's a problem. I know the basics: stay away from any sort of floral paraphernalia and wicker furniture, but aside from that I'm generally clueless. Maybe I should adhere to the stereotype which states that I need either those guys from Queer Eye or a vagina to be able to decorate a house properly. Not having either, I'm pretty much screwed.
People are funny in that numerous things can be done to them. Think of the experiments that you would see in a third grade science fair: anything that can be done there, can be done to people in general. Well, maybe not legally, but they can be done. I'm not one for pinning someone down to a piece of plywood or dissecting off arms and legs, but I do like to collect. That's right, I collect people. I need as many different types of people as I can get my greedy little address book on. Seriously, you never know when an O.C.D. O.B.G.Y.N. may come in handy (fun with abbreviations...yay!).
These are the people I generally keep off my list
During my time on earth I have gotten to know some amazing people. Amazing is an interesting word choice simply because you can be amazed both in both good and bad ways. You can be amazed at how generous a person can be, how caring, how complacent, how annoying, and finally how so f*ck*ing r*t*rd*d someone can be (would you like to buy a vowel...more play with letters) that you have to just get up and push them off a cliff for fear of your sanity. I'm one of the lucky ones in the sense that I know more of the former than the latter. Still though, not to brag, I know some pretty amazing people. Let us recap:
1. The Over-achiever. I know many of these, and many of my friends could easily fall into the category. Still though there is one which takes the A+ cake. Harvard Medical School, triple Major, etc. Little Miss 4.6 gpa had the potential to be one of the most annoying people in the world. The fact of the matter is, she isn't. She's one of the nicest people you will ever come across: totally grounded, head on straight...not one of those people hooked on protein shakes and pocket protectors, comparing notes on advanced differential equations and last week's episode of NUMB3RS. She's going to be a doctor, my other friends are computer engineers...and I like to color.
Peter and I have something in common...
2. The Finance Specialist. When it comes to money, my favorite color is red. Therefore, I can't say anything bad about those who work with it because I don't understand it in the first place. IRAs, financing, you name it. About the only thing I'm good for with regard to money is either a) spending it, or b) putting it in the savings account and collecting the penny of interest I get after having it in there for 10 years. As such, I can't knock a guy for (as he put it) "using money to make money". Glad he's on my side.
My piggy bank is HUNGRY!
3. The Lawyer. Lawyers scare me. Seriously, they freak me out. There is nothing more frightening to me than the thought of someone waiting for me to come home at night just so they can hand me a piece of paper and sue me. You always need a good lawyer nearby, so I'm glad to add her to my collection. When I'm old and senile, she can fight off all the parking tickets and lawsuits that I get from forgetting to take my medication and chase the elephants down the road. Always have one friends who's a lawyer...and one who's a Jew, that's the golden rule.
4. The Vet Tech. As far as animals go, she is the authority. She restrains canines three times her size, gives injections to angry cats, can administer anesthesia...all before lunch. In other words...she keeps the bitches in line.
Good advice
5. The writer-warehouse worker-yoga instructor-possible masseuse. A true renaissance man of alternative medicine/high powered water dispensing mechanical part persuasion. Seriously, he is the jack of all trades in my collection. I once believed that he would end up being a teacher, but since has moved away in a different direction (although I still think that things would get pretty interesting if he were to teach high school English). Still though, I think that he's very well suited to changing the world through chanting "Om" and dealing with people who are so double jointed they make Olympic gymnasts look like amateurs. That I know is something I couldn't do. I get angry when the person's order in front of me at the Starbucks is longer than 10 syllables. Those yoga types...yikes. Uh, I'd like a non-fat double whipped cafe americano iced mocha with an extra shot of espresso, two shots wheat grass, and a clump of sod on the side...
This is what happens when Vets date martial arts/yoga types...
6. The pharmacist. Perhaps one of the most important friends a guy can have. They can dispense two of the most important things in the world: drugs, and possibly a loan.
Losers.
And of course there are are that are currently in my collection, but these are the ones that come to mind just as of now. Moral of the story, the more people you have, the better off you are.
4. The Vet Tech. As far as animals go, she is the authority. She restrains canines three times her size, gives injections to angry cats, can administer anesthesia...all before lunch. In other words...she keeps the bitches in line.
